Because it is February

I pick up my phone to call my mom to share the good news, or seek solace in face of the bad. Then I stop. Helpless agony fills me yet again with the realization that she is dead.

I have been doing this for three years now, more so because it is February and my Mom died on Valentine’s Day. I wrote her eulogy.

I saw Grandma at the grocery store this Saturday. Joy filled me and I ran with my shopping cart to hug her. I’d been thinking of her for months and longing to talk to her. We hugged and it was wonderful. There’s nothing like a hug from Grandma.

She had a bag of tomatoes in her cart. If I only wanted a bag of tomatoes, I wouldn’t bother with a cart. We talked, but only for a few minutes. The mother and the daughter of Karen Ann. We were both in a hurry to leave the store and curl up with a movie…we both said so at the same time. Then Grandma removed the tomatoes from her cart, put them back, and left.

On the drive home, I realized it was strange to see Grandma at that store. She lives on the opposite side of town. But then I remembered it is February…and that grocery store is next to the craft store that Mom, Grandma, and I used to frequent every Saturday.

Grandma is still hurting too. I know this now and I feel like an ass for not thinking about it before.

I’m going to call Grandma and spend more time with her. Not just because it’s February. 

Winner of THE SHADOW OF TIAMAT!

...And the winner is MICHEL KING!!! W00000T!!! 

Calling in Sick Today...but laughter's good medicine.

Between a week-long sinus infection and an unpleasant bout of food poisoning, I didn't get around to writing a blog post for today. Since laughter is the best medicine, I spent some time on my favorite productivity inhibiting site: Cracked.com. One of the articles that did further injury to my stomach was: The 15 Worst Album Covers of All Time

I wasn't surprised to see the Scorpions: Virgin Killer original cover as #1 and some were equally offensive. But many were hilarious. One was so craptastic and funny that I almost want it made into a T-shirt.

Ladies and gentlemen: I give you BONED.

Many guitarists act like their guitar is an extension of their penis, but these guys seem to think their penis IS their guitar...At least, I think that's what's going on here. I wonder why this one's not cordless. Either way, I'm gonna have my husband keep an eye out for this gem when he's shopping for his record collection.

On another note. The contest to win THE SHADOW OF TIAMAT by Sean T. Poindexter is still OPEN, leave a comment and I'll draw a winner on Sunday. 

What is Writing Sex Scenes like for a Man? A Smutty Interview with Sean Poindexter

Today we welcome special guest, Sean T. Poindexter, author of the urban fantasy novel, THE SHADOW OF TIAMAT. The novel not only had kick-ass dragon fights and a sweet love story, it also had plenty of hot dragon sex. :) So I HAD to get Sean over here to talk sex-scenes from a male POV. 

So, let my questions commence!

1.) Do you think writing sex scenes is different for a man vs. for a woman?

I don't really know...I've only written them as a man. But really, I'm not sure. I know that some people assume that when a man is writing a sex scene, it's because he's just putting his fantasies out on paper. Apparently, they don't think a woman writer would ever do that kind of thing. In any event, I'm sure this happens but not for me. I'm not writing out my fantasies. Especially since in the first book, the love scenes all almost all told from the female's point of view. So, unless someone thinks it's my secret fantasy to be a woman and be made love to by a male dragon in human form, then I'm not just writing out my fantasies. I wrote those parts of the book because I felt that was what needed to happen there. The first love scene between Meg and Garrett occurs after a long--relatively--pursuit that builds tension between the characters. Having a fade-to-black scene that starts with Garrett carrying Meg to bed and then fades back in with "The next morning, Meg couldn't walk..." would have been cheating to the readers.

2.)Do you do any kind of research for your love scenes?

I guess you could call it research...I've found that an invaluable trait of all successful physical relationship is empathy. You have to be able to understand what your partner likes, doesn't like, and why. And you have to be able to figure out what they want without being told all the time. In order to do that, you have to talk to them, spend time with them, and try things until you find what works for you both. In a truly healthy physical relationship, one person won't enjoy something that the other person doesn't. This same empathetic trait assists in writing the love scenes in my books. Not only am I able to write Garrett as a lover, but also empathize enough with Meg that I can convincingly portray her wants and desires, and predict how she would realistically react to different kinds of touching. When in doubt, I've always been able to ask my wife or one of my female friends to look over something I've written and let me know what they think. Their input has been invaluable.

3.) What gave you the courage to break tradition?

I wasn't aware that I had broken any traditions. There are many male authors who write books with love scenes. And there are many female authors who don't. I just happen to be one of the former.

4.) What reactions have you received from readers?

Overall, they've been great. I have had a reviewer say she skipped those scenes because she doesn't like reading them, though she really enjoyed the rest of the book. It is fascinating to me the wide spectrum of opinions on at which point a love scene becomes pornographic. I've had readers tell me the scenes were very tame and tasteful, and I've had others say they were borderline erotica/pornography. It's interesting to me because it shows how subjective the measure is. But my publisher, Crescent Moon Press, does not publish erotica or pornography. So on as objective a scale as possible, I would say that if any of the love scenes in my book came to or crossed the line into erotica/pornography, they wouldn't have allowed them in the book. 

 5.) What does your lovely wife think of "those scenes?"

She loves them! She's a huge fan of my books. I'd say my biggest fan. She loves the scenes as well. And yes, she would tell me if she didn't like something. She always has before.

Sean will be here to answer questions and to give away a copy of THE SHADOW OF TIAMAT to one lucky winner who leaves a comment.

...and if you don't win, you can always get a copy at any of these locations:

Paperback from Amazon: http://amzn.to/tiamat-ppb
Paperback from B&N: http://bit.ly/voMy5Z
Kindle from Amazon: http://amzn.to/tiamat-kindle
Nook from B&N: http://bit.ly/tiamat-nook
Other ebook formats: http://bit.ly/utxfuB
Paperback from Books-A-Million: http://bit.ly/rMQ7fi
Paperback from Powell's Books : http://bit.ly/uRJbpK
Paperback/ebook from Indiebound: http://bit.ly/vwKpcP

Thanks so much for coming today, Sean! 

Don't Piss off Romanceland

It's happened again. Another jackass is bashing the romance genre with asinine assumptions and incorrect data to support his argument...and that's the issue. I don't care if someone doesn't like a genre, but ad hominem attacks on readers and writers in such a libelous manner get me seething.

A few highlights from this guy's rant: Romance authors are mistakenly put on a "pedestal as if they are in the same class as authors of a much higher standing." Romance novels will never be part of a college curriculum..and of course they are "lessor" works. (His typo, not mine.) Oh, and he called us illiterate n' stuff.

I would have been content to giggle over that and submit a comment citing proof of his errors...but he grew even more obnoxious in the comments section: " As I said earlier, I object to grown women reading and thinking on thigs they should have gotten out of the way when they were still girls. It seems to me the inellectually lazy shoe is very much on the other foot."

I responded to that comment...but then it got deleted. 

Apparently the same thing happened to author Shiloh Walker. But she was tech savvy enough to take pictures. She discusses her experience here.

Since Ms. Walker summed up the matter very well, I see no need to repeat the same arguments. So instead, I made memes.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you: TROLL MAN!

He described himself as "sexy" and "single" Hmmm... the latter seems obvious, but the former?

And the guy has a donate button. For what purpose, I don't know. Even Comic Book Guy from "The Simpsons" has more class.

....The last is inspired by mine and Shiloh Walker's experience.

Becoming a Ninja in Productivity

Yesterday I had a bunch of stuff going on that interfered with my writing. The first one was a four hour long bunch of BS that I wasn't supposed to be involved with, but still had to show up and wait in line to prove this was the case.

When I arrived, I slipped on the ice and nailed my elbow and knee, which doubled my foul mood. Then I got packed in a room resembling a sardine can with 30 people while we waited...and waited...and waited. It was too tight to use my laptop but luckily I was given a pen and scrap paper. With this, I was able to compose Friday's blog post and next week's author interview. Then I outlined the next few scenes in my WIP, write 300 words, and organize my to-do list for the next 2 days.

Thankfully, I provided the right paperwork so I don't have to go back there again.

Then, while waiting at the doctor's office, I was able to email the interview questions to my next guest author and transcribe the 300 words to my manuscript.

The moral of the story: Don't let things stop you from getting things done. Sneak in what you can when you can. You'll be surprised at the results! 

Courting the Muse with Unconventional means.

Trent Reznor: King of Depressing Inspiration

Every writer has types of scenes they dread writing. For some it's love scenes, others have issues with action or exposition. For me, it's the sad scenes that do me in. I will use any excuse necessary to avoid the keyboard when one of those come up. And once I do get to the document, the words crawl...and they often turn out dry and distant.

Well, this time I couldn't do it that way. My crit partners are on my butt to get my weekly quota of pages to them  AND they will have no mercy if those pages aren't up to snuff.

So I really had to dig deep and utilize some unconventional methods to get that scene out. I don't usually listen to music when I write because I prefer total silence. But this time I did. I listened to REALLY sad music. Highlights were: "The Moonlight Sonata" by Beethoven, songs from the soundtrack for INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE, and most of all, "Something I can Never Have" by NINE INCH NAILS.

...and it worked. The scene came alive to the music, so much that I had a giant lump in my throat the whole time writing it.

What about you? What scenes are hardest for you? What unusual (for you) tactics have you used to get them out?