Friday, October 28, 2011

16 Horror Movie Recommendations! ...and WINNER of TRINA M. LEE's giveaway!

Drummmmmrollllllll....And the winner is DON!!!! I will pass on your email to the awesome Trina Lee!

I was born and raised on horror movies and developed a taste for the macabre, the abnormal, potty humor, and cheese. If it weren't a blog post my list would be miles long. I'm trying to make this list as short as possible here, so I'm gonna break it into categories. There's only one vampire film on here...but that's 'cuz I'm saving vampire movies for their own post.

The categories:

Okay for Kids:

The Addams Family & Addams Family Values
Full of enough spookiness for the holiday, goofiness for the younguns, and inside humor for the parents, these two are classics. Also, Gomez & Morticia have the best marriage I've seen on a screen.

Seriously, it's a marriage one can only dream about.

Ghostbusters & Ghostbusters 2

Never have I seen a better PG mix of horror and comedy...and if you haven't seen these movies already, I will feel compelled to slap you.


...and damn, now I just realized I need to add Ghostbusters 2 and Addams Family Values in my "Good Movie Sequels" list...with Ghostbuster's 2 taking the #1 spot. 

BEETLEJUICE


'Cuz Tim Burton's the MAN! There was a cartoon series back in the day that was even better...alas, it's not been released yet. :( 


Damn, now I got the cartoon theme song stuck in my head.



NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS:

A Christmas and Halloween mashup... that's also an animated musical. Need I say more? Yes! Again, 'cuz Tim Burton's the MAN! I will also recommend this for the Christmas season.

We all learn the same lesson as the protagonist: Halloween kicks Christmas's ass!



Cheesetacular Craptastic:

NIGHT OF THE DEMONS.

I will now state the obvious: I have a thing for the 80's...and spooky houses. This film is the epitome of low budget 80's horror. The puns and bad acting only increased the fun. And lipstick was used in the most creative...and disturbing way possible. But, this movie broke the traditions of the time in a big way. Watch it and find out.

NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 1, 3 & 4 

I'm a complete Freddy fanatic. My mama raised me that way. :) I could write an extensive thesis on all the nifty stuff about this franchise...but since it's a blog post I'll just point you at the documentary, which is as fun as the movies. And I'll leave you with a some trivia:

1.) A LOT of big stars debuted with Elm Street: JOHNNY DEPP, Patricia Arquette and Lawrence Fishburne. ALICE COOPER also had a cameo in part 6.

One, two, Freddy's coming for you. 

RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD

This is the movie that gave zombies their iconic slogan: Braiiiiiiiins! Also, I swear half the cast of NIGHT OF THE DEMONS was in it. It was a film that had me applauding glorious cheese all the way through.

3 words: Zombie split-dogs


MONSTURD

Just like any writer, I appreciate sophisticated satire. But sometimes I just gotta have some potty humor. And yes, this is about a poop-monster. The sequel" RETARDEAD, was entertaining as well.

This is the very definition of  "Craptastic."


ACTUALLY SCARY Movies. 

PET SEMATARY:

Yeah, I know, a lot of you are going, "Meh, it's not that scary." This is the only actual "horror" movie that has really scared the crap out of me. I was 8 when I first saw it. It ain't so bad now on the surface. But the concept of your loved ones coming back evil and wanting to kill you still churns my insides. Also... CREEPY LITTLE KIDS!!! I absolutely LOATHE CREEPY little kids...It was probably inspired by this movie...and THE SHINING.
Don't read the book. It'll ruin The Ramones for you for the rest of your life.
DELIVERANCE:
You'll never hear banjos the same way again.


Okay... I live in Northern Idaho...and for a lot of you that automatically means I'm a redneck, unless it's just a summer home. But....

A.) I live in Coeur d'Alene, which is among the top desired locations for the rich & famous. Oprah bought 2 condos like 6 blocks away from me and Eddie Money drives by our house once in awhile in his Hummer and waves. We have a great balance of "City" and "Picturesque Outdoors"


B.) Yeah... a lot of "redneck" jokes do apply to me...but if you hunt, fish....or have low income, I'm sure they apply to you as well. :)


C.) I did Census work out in "the boonies" where "real" rednecks are to be found. North Idaho "rednecks" have great, full sets of teeth, do not speak in twangy accents (They and I sound as boring and un-exotic as sitcom stars) and do not play banjo while contemplating terrorist gang-rape.

Anyway, this movie combines many redneck stereotypes and throws in a few new ones in the most horrifying manner possible...with some gang rape.


THE EXORCIST:


Excellent book...kinda-sorta boring movie...at first. Then you see this freaky-crab-walk action and you're scarred for life. One of my stepdaughters had a tantrum like this years ago...and the nightmares still come.

Seriously, this scene is not right.

And....ANYTHING WITH CLOWNS IN IT!
This pic is from Killer Klowns From Outer Space, which is supposed to be a funny movie. I ask you, is there anything "funny" about THAT?

JUST PLAIN AWESOME:

GINGERSNAPS:


Author Trina M. Lee recommended this one to me a year ago. I gotta say: hands down, the BEST werewolf movie ever. I'm not usually into werewolves. (Not a dog person, LOL) but  this film transcended my bias. Rounded, engaging characters, good-times gore, and surprising emotional moments. This one's a keeper.

The most unbelievable thing about this movie was siblings getting along so well.

From Dusk Till Dawn


It's like a math formula: Quentin Tarantino + Robert Rodriguez + vampires = AWESOME. Everything they do together is good times. ::sigh Desperado...sigh...fans self::: Anyway: the quirky characters, the action, & the profanity makes this one a classic.



Also, it's the only movie where George Clooney is cute.  If I get raging arguments in my comments section from the Clooney-fans, I'll know some women are reading my blog. Mwah hah hah hah hah. 

ARMY OF DARKNESS

This one's an ultimate classic. It's like the PRINCESS BRIDE of horror-dom. ALL MUST SEE AND QUOTE IT ON A REGULAR BASIS. And dude, Bruce Campbell's on twitter!

We all want "some sugar" and more of Ash's "Boomstick."

ROSE RED:

In my opinion, one of the best haunted house movies EVER!!! It's really long, but totally worth it.


And Stephen King has a quick cameo...see if you can spot it.
Anyway, I could list 100s more and I'm always looking for recommendations. Please share your favorites! 

1 comment:

  1. Army Of Darkness is quite possibly the BEST cheesy horror flick EVER. I quote it constantly. I think "this here's my boomstick" is my favorite! Bahaha!!!

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