2012 Recap

January: I kept up with my blogging and plowed full steam ahead into Book 2 of my Regency Paranormal romance series. My critique partners, Bonnie R. Paulson and Shelley Martin are too be thanked for providing crucial feedback and motivation.

February: This month has been difficult for me since my mom passed away on Valentine's day of '09. However, I think I handled February of 2012 pretty well. I kept writing, kept blogging, and didn't overdo it on the drinking. I slept through the actual day and went back to writing.

March: As winter began to abate, life got easier as usual. I got to go to the movies for the first time in for-e-ver. Naturally, we went to see the HUNGER GAMES. LOVED IT! I got further on book 2 and began getting acquainted with my fellow Sourcebooks Casablanca authors. Awesome ladies!

April: I wore my fingers to the bone going for the final stretch in my novel...and I got to do the best thing ever for my writing productivity. I ditched my family to stay in a hotel room. I drank red bull and hard cider and chain smoked while writing non-stop for hours. I took a few breaks to swim in the 24 hour pool before returning to the world of my characters. I think some of the best scenes were accomplished that night.

May: W000t! I finished the rough draft of book 2, then I finished revising the first book in my urban fantasy series, THEN I started a new rock star romance novella. I also made the decision to go back to college and get my English degree because I was tired of being a janitor. In many ways it was a dream job. The solitude and ability to listen to music all shift was glorious. However, the low pay and other annoyances eventually wore on me. I also got to enjoy a good season of fishing and morel mushroom picking.

June: Ahh, sweet, glorious summer! I eased off a little on my workaholic frenzy and allowed myself to socialize and catch up on fishing.

July: This was a fun month. We kicked off with an awesome 4th of July BBQ. Our neighbor fell in the pond.

We also picked several gallons of huckleberries and I finished the rough draft of a rock star romance novella.
Best of all, I got to work on the developmental edits with the awesome Deb Werksman. She is wonderful to work with!

August: My husband went out of town for two weeks and I celebrated my 30th birthday. My party was awesome. I had live music!

While the husband was away, we were supposed to quit smoking. I wanted to kill everything....especially when my beloved cat, Isis, died--- on my birthday. Some good things were that the anger from quitting smoking totally killed my appetite so I lost like 15 pounds.

Also I got the cover for BITE ME, YOUR GRACE! And I was able to work a deal with a friend so I could use his house as office space two nights a week. I got my copyedits done in a week.

September: I started college as well as the third book in my regency paranormal romance series. OMG, I had no idea that I'd be so slammed. If it weren't for my weekly writing nights I wouldn't have made it. I quickly learned that "self defense" was not the best choice for a P.E. credit. I pulled my groin muscle the second week and had to use a cane for a few days. By the end of the month, I gave up on quitting smoking.

October: So slammed with school I practically missed Halloween. But I got a new cat. He belonged to the neighbors until they got a new puppy. Then he adopted me.

November: Still slammed with school....and page proofs.

December: I made it through the semester with 4 As a B and a C+. It was a joy to go on vacation and focus on my writing. Almost at the halfway mark in Book 3. I got my ARCs in and almost died from joy.

Merry Christmas, all!

The view from Grandma's house

Merry Christmas, everyone! It's an extremely busy time for me. First we go to my paternal grandmother's tree farm on Christmas eve for dinner and celebrating. Then we go home and drink eggnog and watch A CHRISTMAS STORY. Once the kids are settled down and in bed we get ready for Santa.

On Christmas morning, we get up waaaaay earlier than I'd prefer and open presents. The kids make a huge mess and it's like pulling teeth to get them to clean up the wrapping paper and get ready for Christmas breakfast at my husband's parent's house. Then I put the turkey in the oven and we head out. My mother in law makes hashbrowns special for me. It's awesome. After breakfast we exchange gifts and then we head back home to get ready to go to my other grandma's house.

At grandma's house we get spoiled rotten with baked treats, pie, and my turkey. The recipe is here.

After all that's over, we go home and I collapse on the couch with some hard cider and refuse to do anything for the next 24 hrs.

It's exhausting, but so wonderful to spend time with my enormous family.

What's your Christmas tradition?

WINNER of the ARC Giveaway!

The winner is...... LIZZIE ASHTON!

...and when I drew the name I realized something fun: The hero's last name is Ashton! Whoa.

Anyway, a huge congrats to Lizzie! Send me your postal info and I'll send you the book!

For the rest of you, thanks so much for entering and for your support. And be sure to stick around because there's going to be lots more chances to win once my blog tour kicks off.

Have a great Saturday! 

End of Semester Celebration... and ARC Giveaway!

Holy crap, my last blog post was in November? I knew was slammed with schoolwork, but damn. Anyway, I'll give you all a recap of my experiences and lessons from the semester later but now we have something more exciting. 

::deep breath::..........

MY ARCS are HERE!!!!!

After much celebrating and showing them off to friends and family, I had to figure out what to do with them....aside from staring in dazed shock. I only got 5. The rest are with reviewers....which has me excited and terrified.

My mother-in-law took one, husband insisted on another, and two went to dear, supportive friends.

The last will go to one winner who comments on this post before Friday at midnight. 

Big hugs to all of you!

Why I think dreams should have a comeback in fiction...and an extrapolation on dick jokes.

I WANT this chandelier!

This blog post was inspired by my last assignment in my literature class.

We're reading Medieval literature right now and finally the instructor gave us a break from the tragic and sometimes just plain boring and assigned us some fabilaux, which are short humor pieces. Two of which were delightfully bawdy.

Here's an example from "A WILD DREAM:" "...the woman launched into her tale, and like it or not, lay all of the details bare of her dream at the penis fair, how some were good and some were bad, and she bought the largest they had, by far more impressive than any, for fifty shillings and a penny."

Seriously, this story was about a woman who fell asleep angry after her husband got too drunk to put out and had a dream about going to a fair selling only dildos. Reading assignments like this are why I love college.

The homework was to answer the question as to if stuff like this is still humorous and why.

 I thought the story was self explanatory. But I still formulated an answer like a good student.:

"As a fan of bawdy comedy, I absolutely adored the phallic humor in the last two tales: 'A Wild Dream,' and 'The Ring That Controlled Erections.'

 I believe that there are indeed enduring elements of human behavior that will always be humorous and those stories are totally still funny today because it is a permanent aspect of human nature to laugh at ourselves. And one of the main ways we laugh at ourselves is through sexual humor. 
Face it, sex, and the parts involved, is quite strange and silly when you really think of it. And the two fabliaux, as well as "LYSISTRATA", prove that dick jokes will remain funny for the duration of human existence." 

Then we were supposed to ask a follow up question to our classmates as well as answer it. I decided this question should be posed to you all as well:

"Dreams are explored a lot in classic literature, but not so much in modern literature because many publishers see it as a cliche. Do you see this as a bad thing?

"I do. 

"Dreams are one of the greatest mysteries and equalizers of humanity. We all have them and none of us understand how or why. We can all empathize with when reading about nightmares and ludicrous adventures in the sleeping mind. I found "A Wild Dream" to be especially funny because I once had a similar dream. (Though I didn't hit my husband in my sleep.) I also once had a dream where I was helping my cats build nests so they could lay their eggs. Crazy dreams are an integral part of human nature and should remain a part of literature."

So, what do you think about dreams in modern fiction? Are they cliche or should they make a comeback?

...and if you're a fan of bawdy literature, I highly recommend LYSISTRATA. It is by far my favorite thing I've read in this class. Monty Python humor and dick jokes abound!

Cover reveal for BITE ME, YOUR GRACE!

OMG OMG OMG, it's finally here! Isn't it lovely!

I adore the tumultuous sky and Gothic manor house in the background. I love how they look like they're trying to rip each other's clothes off. I love how the characters look like the characters! I love the guy's sexy long hair, Brad Pitt lips, and sweet man titty. Oh yes, we like sweet man titty around here.

April 1st, you guys! ...and in the meantime, BITE ME, YOUR GRACE is available for pre-order on Amazon and Barnes & Noble!

Okay, I'm going to go back to squealing and jumping up and down. Have a great weekend, all!

10 More Horror Movie Recommendations!

It's the Halloween season, which means I'm back with more movies recommendations. From scary to goofy, from classic to obscure, there should be something here to get you into the Halloween spirit.

1.) Vampire Party

I totally gotta thank the awesome Urban Fantasy author, Jess Haines, for turning me onto this hilarious French film. Chock full of corny humor, puns, and off-color shenanigans, I couldn't stop laughing. There were spoofs on spoofs!

2.) American Gothic

My husband introduced me to this one. A group of people wreck a plane on an island off the pacific northwest coast and encounter the only inhabitants: an old-school "Ma and Pa Kettle" couple and their three "kids." I gotta say, it's one of the most creepy and messed up movies I've ever seen. It's flat out WRONG on so many levels, but you can't look away....and then you can't stop traumatizing other people with it and recommending it on your blog.

The one who played "Ma" also played Lily Munster

3.) Gremlins 1 and 2

I chose these for something family-friendly. These movies epitomize the universal adage: "FOLLOW DIRECTIONS!"

I can't be the only one who thinks they're just as cute when you feed them after midnight.

.....okay, maybe not.

4.) Fright Night

What really made this movie awesome was its quirky characterization. Every member of the cast has their time to shine. For the most part, FRIGHT NIGHT is lighthearted and full of laughs... except for the scene with the wolf. Completely mind-blowing in its incredible display of emotion and special effects, it REALLY makes this one epic.

Best line ever: "Honey, are you okay? Do you want a Valium?"

5.) 1408

Holy mind-f*ck, Batman. Watching 1408 almost makes you feel like you're on drugs. With a deceptively calm beginning, the film soothes you into a false sense of security before accelerating the crazy-sauce to an almost unbearable adrenaline rush.

Best line: "Do you drink, Mr. Enslin?" "Of course, I'm a writer."

6.) Retardead

Yeah, not exactly a "P.C." title, but if you like Craptastic horror movies, you'll love this one. It's the sequel to "Monsturd." The evil scientist who created the poop monster now unleashes his next evil plan: to turn special needs people into an army of supergeniuses to help him take over the world. Unfortunately, his experiment has some horrifying side effects.

The only movie with homemade special effects so gruesome, I actually gagged...then applauded.

7.) The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

Remakes are usually a tough sell for me, but I totally love this one more than the original. For one, it stays fairly true to the original. For another, they actually gave the heroine a brain and didn't have her obnoxiously screaming the whole time, which was the main reason I didn't love the 1974 version.

8.) Creepshow

Okay, this is more like a bunch of mini-films, but they're all a lot of fun. Sai King's cameo is one of my faves. "Meteor shit!" LOL.

Another favorite line: "I waaaant my birthday caaaaaake!"

9.) When the Bough Breaks

Sometimes when you randomly rent a movie, you are pleasantly surprised. This one is another "holy hell, that's disturbing!" kinda flicks. I'm not usually a fan of serial killer movies, but this one's intriguing and twisted enough to keep my attention.

Severed hands and ice cream trucks....yeah.

10.) IT

Okay, the book is waaaaaaaay better, but the movie has its good points,Tim Curry being one of the biggest ones. Either way, the premise of a group of misfits finding true friendship and defeating a monster has got to be one of the best stories ever.

We all float down here.